allyson

[allyson]

[pollyjean]

what would we do without onions and garlic....

[allyson]

i just need some peas and quiet sometimes

[allyson]

are we human

[fingersareoptional]

or are we dentists

[allyson]

[allyson]

[anarcho-shindouism]

it’s dangerous to go alone. take this

[romy7]

thanks

[allyson]

[mynewurl]

this website has destroyed my sense of humour, last night i was in bed with my bf and i had a mental image of an egg with the word suspicious written on it and honestly lost my shit

[mynewurl]

[allyson]

[pissyjorts]

life… is an egg

[kavvka]

explain

[pissyjorts]

has chickens in it sometimes

[allyson]

[musterni-illustrates]

me gazing out into the ocean: sure is some scary soup

[allyson]

[esmeanne]

vampires really should be able to get drunk they literally have to be alive forever let them have this

[1953swan]

hc: vampires have no blood so they get drunk faster than people

[bellas-orange-jansport]

charlie pulling over a shirtless carlisle at 4 am: dr cullen your blood alcohol content is literally 100% how are you not dead

carlisle: au contraire im absolutely dead

[maximum-marrs]

I did not expect a decent twilight joke on my dash in 2019, but nevertheless there it is and it’s hilarious.

[allyson]

[babyanimalgifs]

14/10 would give her unlimited amount of treats (@hanawego)